I love Saturdays! No really I do, its my day. My day to do whatever it is I want, and today I want to clean. Yep, I have been psyching myself out all week for this day and I think it has worked. That or the Zoloft is finally doing its job! Whatever the reason, I have my day planned to a tee. Living room, bathroom, bedroom, and kitchen. Note that I saved the kitchen for last because I hate it. You would think someone that loves to cook as much as I do would want a clean kitchen to do it in. No that's the funny thing about an amazing cook, she/he can cook under any conditions, even WWIV conditions. You learn to cook around the mess. Just push something to the side, ignore the stickiness at your feet, and pray to God for a halfway clean pot.
But the reality is cooking is a spiritual thing, a very creative explosion of ideas, and cleaning... well isn't. I suppose for some it can be quite relieving and a cleansing of the soul. For me it is torture. I, having ADHD, struggle to focus efforts on one thing for an extended period of time. And by extended period of time mean anything longer than 5 minutes. You could say I have a childlike mentality, and when it comes to cleaning you be right because the entire time I am cleaning I am thinking of ways to get out if. But that's where your rightness stops, because my ability to creatively get out of cleaning is simply short of genius. I simply think of the best thing I could make for dinner that would require the most amount of time, search the internet for dessert ideas, and when four o'clock rolls around my hair is done, my boobs are pushed to my chin, and I am wearing the sexiest thing I can muster while getting ready to plate a 4 star meal. Yes ADHD and creativity are bitches, but damn if I haven't impressed the husband more than I can count because of them. Oh and that whole getup most certainly gets me out of cleaning because in order to eat, and then have sex, the husband must wash dishes and silverware.
But perhaps I am being to hard on myself because I am, whether lazy or not, am using my creativity to my advantage, and doing it well. That I can be proud of. Because at the end of the day it doesn't really matter how clean your house is, whether or not you are envied because of how you decorated, or if your house is so organized when your husband leaves you his next wife can find everything. No, what matters is that your husband would never think of leaving you because the quickest way to a mans heart is through his stomach and then his genitals, and as I have mentioned I have those things mastered.
But the reality is cooking is a spiritual thing, a very creative explosion of ideas, and cleaning... well isn't. I suppose for some it can be quite relieving and a cleansing of the soul. For me it is torture. I, having ADHD, struggle to focus efforts on one thing for an extended period of time. And by extended period of time mean anything longer than 5 minutes. You could say I have a childlike mentality, and when it comes to cleaning you be right because the entire time I am cleaning I am thinking of ways to get out if. But that's where your rightness stops, because my ability to creatively get out of cleaning is simply short of genius. I simply think of the best thing I could make for dinner that would require the most amount of time, search the internet for dessert ideas, and when four o'clock rolls around my hair is done, my boobs are pushed to my chin, and I am wearing the sexiest thing I can muster while getting ready to plate a 4 star meal. Yes ADHD and creativity are bitches, but damn if I haven't impressed the husband more than I can count because of them. Oh and that whole getup most certainly gets me out of cleaning because in order to eat, and then have sex, the husband must wash dishes and silverware.
But perhaps I am being to hard on myself because I am, whether lazy or not, am using my creativity to my advantage, and doing it well. That I can be proud of. Because at the end of the day it doesn't really matter how clean your house is, whether or not you are envied because of how you decorated, or if your house is so organized when your husband leaves you his next wife can find everything. No, what matters is that your husband would never think of leaving you because the quickest way to a mans heart is through his stomach and then his genitals, and as I have mentioned I have those things mastered.
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